Mon
Aug
15
And im only saying it on here because its the only place where my mom cant see what i post…shes going to flip! (in a bad way)
Tue
Jun
7
Today was fun but made me realize so much. Yes it was good to hang out but its nothing like the old time and surprisingly out of all my friends im the least comfortable around you now and it use to be your the only one i was comfortable with. No I didnt mind you trying to fix your relationship with her but honestly what about whats right in front of you? Dont you think its sad that we have completly different lives now and dont know whats constantly going on with each other like we use to? I play it off like whatever but everything you were complaining about , about her is how I feel. I feel like im the last one you want to hangout with and I found it ironic that you were saying how she always wants to hang out with other people and how much it bothered your but like HELLO!? I understand we hang with different people but even outside of that all we do is maybe a wave to eachother throught a whole day when we use to be literally joined at the hip (or arm). I thought we were going to be the ones that told our children weve been friends since elementry school but now its like accquaintances and our hang outs are always boring. Everytime we actually do something its hit the library… WOAH we are crazy together! Aside from today I just wish you wanted to do the fun things together like we use to. Anyways im not trying to have a pity party i just feel like i finally know how I feel, do i miss how it use to be ? of course do I think things will ever be the same? No.
Wed
Sep
8
Hey you up there….wish to test me anymore today? It would be great if you would quit it thanks .
Fri
Aug
27
Im in a mad mood so to start this off….
1. These chicken nuggets are horrible and that makes me mad
2. Is suppose to be out having a great time …instead ive been watching a plethora of Glee episodes
3. My house has never not have food and honestly we dont even have milk. It was the first time I had to search for food.
4. WTF is going on with my grades, honestly.
5. The biggest thing on my mind is friends. I remember the night before 7th grade my dad told me that by the time i get out of middle school i will have a complete new group of friends. My response…ya right dad that wont happen. Honestly, it didnt i lost one friend and that was it, my relationships if anything grew stronger. But now being a junior i finally realized what my dad ment. Slowly everyone started being a part of different groups and honestly i dont mind the group you hang with but i just dont see me wiith them. Youve changed but havent no what I mean? We dont ever talk anymore your too “busy” I feel like we are just friends because weve been friends for so long. I feel like we dont even have recent memories like before everyday was a new memory and now i dont even know the last thing we did together. I hate that for some reason we dont click anymore and i feel like im an incovience to your life. I feel like we talk because we have to or something. I wish you would include me in some of the things you do but i find that requires me to not be myself which im not down for. Cant we go back to like elem. school when hanging out was actually fun not just sit around and do nothing. Doesnt everyone want that now a days. Weve always had our plans but its become apparent that when we all graduate, ill be off to bsu and we most likely will lose touch. That sucks.
6.I hate when i get crumbs of nasty chcken nuggets in my bed -______- goodnight.
Sun
Aug
8
seriously. WTF? I cant do this anymore. I cant see you once every 3-4 months knowing you have a girlfriend and not being able to do anything about it. I hate how close we get when we do see each other than I go home and lay in bed recapping the day, and realize I have to go that long with out seeing you again. Why when I wake up the next morning am I like clinically depressed, cant move, dont want to move. And more importantly why when I do get over you its time to see you put on another show? It starts all up again. Today you looked like a fool up on that stage but in the end my feelings never changed it went right back to the old feelings. Why was I so excited to see you today, actually cared what I looked like only to not even make eye contact with you. You say hi and take pics with all my sibiling look at the camera im holding put on that gorgeous smile and then walk away without saying anything? Why did i get a text from you 10 mins later saying “how did I do” “what was your favorite song i did” “what was your favorite scene I was in”? Yet you cant even effing SAY HI! much less look at me?! Most importantly why do I care this much? I never write on this kind of stuff about this kind of stuff. Even more importantly why am I already thinking of when I get to see him again? whats wrong with me? :’(
